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jnco
Forum Newbie
Joined: Fri Mar 06, 2009 12:00 am
Posts: 20
Location: under the stove
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 smexy Kinds Of Sex
The 1st kind of sex is called: Smurf Sex.
* This kind of sex happens when you first meet someone, and you both have sex until you are blue in the face.
The 2nd kind of sex is called: Kitchen Sex.
* This is when you have been with your partner for a short time, and you are so needy you will have sex anywhere, even in the kitchen.
The 3rd kind of sex is called: Bedroom Sex.
* This is when you have been with your partner for a long time. Your sex has gotten routine, and you usually have sex only in your bedroom.
The 4th kind of sex is called: Hallway Sex
* This is when you have been with your partner for too long. When you pass each other in the hallway you both say "screw you."
The 5th kind of sex is called: Religious Sex.
* Which means you get Nun in the morning, Nun in the afternoon and Nun at night. (Very Popular)
The 6th kind is called Courtroom Sex.
* This is when you cannot stand your wife any more. She takes you to court and screws you in front of everyone.
The 7th kind of sex is called: Social Security Sex.
* You get a little each month. But not enough to enjoy yourself.
should i make new posts for each joke, or should i stick all under the same one?.?
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Where am I and why does it smell like the underside of a man boob?
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| Sun Jul 18, 2010 11:47 am |
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Cyning of Scedenig
Not Worthy of [n00b]
Joined: Tue Apr 06, 2010 4:17 am
Posts: 2079
Location: California
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Re: smexy Religion sex...I actually have a friend up in Washington who is getting married at the age of 19. He and his girlfriend are the most religious people I know and have been together for 3 years now, and they want to have sex so bad that they will be getting married in December. I doubt it will last long...
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| Sun Jul 18, 2010 3:36 pm |
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dirkdeagler
[n00b] Member
Joined: Sun Oct 25, 2009 7:12 pm
Posts: 3663
Location: Mt Hood, Oregon
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Re: smexy i thought based on the title that this thread would be about Gin.
seeing that it's not has left me disappointed.
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Time 02/21/2010 @ 17:17:03
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| Sun Jul 18, 2010 5:31 pm |
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-sugar-
[n00b] Member
Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2010 3:00 pm
Posts: 725
Location: Sanford, ME
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Re: smexy i thought it was cute :o
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-just a girl
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| Sun Jul 18, 2010 8:13 pm |
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Monkeyjive
[n00b] Member
Joined: Sat Jul 10, 2010 4:41 pm
Posts: 38
Location: San Diego, Ca
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Re: smexy Haha, my gf and I were cracking up.
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| Sun Jul 18, 2010 11:08 pm |
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krick3t
[n00b] Member
Joined: Thu Jun 10, 2010 8:33 pm
Posts: 173
Location: Georgia
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Re: smexy another good one jnco
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| Mon Jul 19, 2010 1:57 am |
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Karajin
[n00b] Member
Joined: Sat Aug 29, 2009 6:15 pm
Posts: 67
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Re: smexy WERE THE F*CK DO YOU HIDE YOU POT 'O JOKES!? Under the gay-Rainbow-Ghost-tongue?
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| Mon Jul 19, 2010 2:42 am |
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Spydermonkey73
Forum Newbie
Joined: Thu Jul 01, 2010 9:49 pm
Posts: 14
Location: Memphis
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Re: smexy true..true
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| Mon Jul 19, 2010 2:43 am |
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jnco
Forum Newbie
Joined: Fri Mar 06, 2009 12:00 am
Posts: 20
Location: under the stove
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Re: smexy What!? who told u about the gay-Rainbow-Ghost-tongue
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Where am I and why does it smell like the underside of a man boob?
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| Mon Jul 19, 2010 10:09 am |
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jnco
Forum Newbie
Joined: Fri Mar 06, 2009 12:00 am
Posts: 20
Location: under the stove
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Re: smexy seems to somewat fit under this heading
Two guys get busted for smoking dope, so they have to go into court on a Friday. They go to court and the judge says, "If you can convince more than 5 people to stop doing drugs for the rest of their lives, you won't be sent to jail." So the two men agree and the judge tells them to come back on Monday. So the two guys come back on Monday and the judge asks how they did. ''I got 17 people to get off drugs,'' says the first guy. ''Wow, how'd you do that?'' asks the judge. ''I used circles. I told them that this large circle is your brain before drugs and this small circle is your brain after drugs."
"Oh, that's nothing!" said the second guy. "I convinced 156 people to get off drugs."
"Wow. How'd you do that?" asked the judge.
"Well, I used circles too. I told them this small circle is your butthole before prison..."
_________________
Where am I and why does it smell like the underside of a man boob?
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| Tue Jul 20, 2010 1:32 pm |
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winitnow
Game Server Admin
Joined: Mon Jul 13, 2009 11:00 pm
Posts: 3113
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Re: smexy lol gg on using circles
_________________  "I am the robber of my cradle. Candy is my body and teddy-bears are my blood. I have snached over a thousand little girls. Unknown to police. Nor known to Chris Henson. Have withstood time to stalk many children. Yet those kids will never be enough. So as I pray--"
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| Tue Jul 20, 2010 8:45 pm |
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dirkdeagler
[n00b] Member
Joined: Sun Oct 25, 2009 7:12 pm
Posts: 3663
Location: Mt Hood, Oregon
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Re: smexy gin is smexy.
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| Tue Jul 20, 2010 10:18 pm |
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Ruger9
[n00b] Member
Joined: Sat Mar 22, 2008 11:00 pm
Posts: 542
Location: NY
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Re: smexy Cyning of Scedenig wrote: Religion sex...I actually have a friend up in Washington who is getting married at the age of 19. He and his girlfriend are the most religious people I know and have been together for 3 years now, and they want to have sex so bad that they will be getting married in December. I doubt it will last long... The Sex or the Marriage?
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"It is easy to fly into a passion... anybody can do that, but to be angry with the right person to the right extent and at the right time and in the right way that is not easy." ~Aristotle~
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| Wed Jul 21, 2010 8:13 am |
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JoeMamma
n00bfest Asshole
Joined: Mon Dec 20, 2004 12:00 am
Posts: 11345
Location: Frisco/McKinney, TX
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Re: smexy Both. Sex is a huge part of marriage, in my eyes; hence, why I don't believe I have a marriage anymore. I'm just "the father" now...
_________________When I fart, it smells like a BBP.  I hope Tom Brady gets anally raped in Hell.
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| Wed Jul 21, 2010 8:45 am |
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WaffleLover
Game Server Admin
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 12:00 am
Posts: 1581
Location: Zuols moms room.
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Re: smexy oh shut up Joe.i hear you talking about porkin your wife in the ass all the time
_________________ Luke: No, I am talking about the man-god named Gage, who's abs lure in virgins from Asia like the sirens do with ships and rocks.
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| Wed Jul 21, 2010 2:21 pm |
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JoeMamma
n00bfest Asshole
Joined: Mon Dec 20, 2004 12:00 am
Posts: 11345
Location: Frisco/McKinney, TX
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Re: smexy Yeah...once upon a time -- about five years ago. Now, twice a month is standard (twice a week is apparently the average for a couple in the US)-- and if I ask for anything more than that, I get the cold shoulder, then I don't talk to her for about a week (like right now).
EDIT: Let me break it down by the years for you: back when I came off my 2003 deployment, we couldn't even wait for our friends to leave a "welcome back" party for me -- we went out in the backyard and fucked like mad. Now, when I came back from my 2009 deployment, I had to wait until three days after I got home before I could get in her pants (and, no...it wasn't cuz of "that time of the month", either)....see the difference?
_________________When I fart, it smells like a BBP. I hope Tom Brady gets anally raped in Hell.
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| Wed Jul 21, 2010 2:29 pm |
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