OK, wussies. This is one I've alreayd done, so it's up to you to beat my score. I like to call this one:

Fecal-Vision!

OK, first things first.... no shit on the walls or floors. Here's what I did:

My son and I were staying in a hotel room a couple of weeks ago. We had taken a trip a few hours away from here, and it was too late to head back home, so we stayed overnight before heading home. It was pretty much a crash/wake-up/head home senario.

When we woke-up and had our continental breakfast, I got an idea for a prank on the hotel staff. After all... they had failed to assist us in getting the X-Box to work on their junkie TV.

My belly was a little upset from the previous day of junk food and heat exhaustion. This place had regular house-style toilets in them with the water control valve located right under the tank in the back of it. So.... I shut off the water valve to the toilet, and flushed it to empty the tank. I then proceded to sit very very close to the front of the toilet and I laid-down an extremely foul and massive brown mushroom cloud on that mofo. For those of you that have laid "floaters" before, you know that it REALLY stinks when that stuff stays in the air instead of being submerged underwater. Since there was only a little bit of water in the bowl itself, there was quite a bit of mexican outhouse action happening above the surface of the water.

Anyway.... the room started filling up with stench IMMEDIATELY! So, to capture the moment and truly make the housekeeping staff vomit, we shut-off the air conditioner and bailed out. We went to eat breakfast at Cracker Barrell and laughed our asses off the whole time, tring to imagine what the staff was going to experience later that day (I set such great examples don't I?)

Just as we headed for the interstate, my son realized he had forgotten his pillow at the hotel. We had done the quick checkout thing, so I still had the keycard thingy. So we headed back to the hotel and when we got to the second floor hallway.... oh the horror! The housekeeping staff was already working that hall! We saw the maid way down the hall already passed our room. We headed down the hall very quiet and cool-like. When we got to our room, we found that she had propped the door open (LOL!) and the air conditioner was on full blast!

The stench in the room was horrible! I shut the door and we stood inside laughing quietly. We did a quick check of the big brown mushroom cloud and found it to be breaking into several smaller parts, but still quite a bit of it was catching the air and causing a horrid smell!

We grabbed his pillow, turned the air conditioner back off again (it was over 100 degrees that day so the heat was a big help to the plan) and locked the door back closed. Then we quietly walked down the hall while the maid was in a different room and left the hotel laughing our asses off.

The best part was, I had someone else who stays in that hotel regularly make the reservation for me. Who knows, maybe they'll flag his account with a "dookie monster" code or something!

ARGH!