>>> > For everyone who has ever had an evaluation -
>>> > just remember, it could
>>> > have been worse. These are actual quotes taken from
>>> > federal government
>>> > employee performance evaluations.
>>> >
>>> > 1. "Since my last report, this employee has
>>> > reached rock-bottom and
>>> > has started to dig."
>>> > 2. "I would not allow this employee to breed."
>>> > 3. "This employee is really not so much of a
>>> > has-been, but more of a
>>> > definite won't be."
>>> > 4. "Works well when under constant supervision
>>> > and cornered likea rat
>>> > in a trap."
>>> > 5. "When he opens his mouth, it seems that it
>>> > is only to change feet."
>>> > 6. "This young lady has delusions of
>>> > adequacy." <BR>> 7. "He sets low personal standards and then
>>> > consistently fails to
>>> > achieve them."
>>> > 8. "This employee is depriving a village
>>> > somewhere of an idiot."
>>> > 9. "This employee should go far, and the
>>> > sooner he starts the better."
>>> > 10. "Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic
>>> > thingy to hold it all
>>> > together."
>>> > 11. "A gross ignoramus - 144 times worse than
>>> > an ordinary ignoramus."
>>> > 12. "He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a
>>> > carrier."
>>> > 14. "I would like to go hunting with him
>>> > sometime."
>>> > 15. "He's been working with glue too much."
>>> > 16. "He would argue with a signpost he painted
>>> > himself."
>>> > 17. "He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves
>>> > the room."
>>> > 18. "When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell."
>>> > 19. "If you see two people talking and one
>>> > looks bored, he's the other
>>> > one."
>>> > 20. "A photog raphic memory but with the lens
>>> > cover glued on."
>>> > 21. "A prime candidate for natural
>>> > de-selection."
>>> > 22. "Donated his brain to science before he
>>> > was done using it."
>>> > 23. "Gates are down, the lights are flashing,
>>> > but the train isn't
>>> > coming."
>>> > 24. "He's got two brains cells, one is lost
>>> > and the other is out
>>> > looking for it."
>>> > 25. "If he were any more stupid, he'd have to
>>> > be watered twice a
>>> > week."
>>> > 26. "If you give him a penny for his thoughts,
>>> > you'd get change."
>>> > 27. "If you stand close enough to him, you can
>>> > hear the ocean."
>>> > 28. "It's hard to believe he beat out
>>> > 1,000,000 other sperm."
>>> > 29. "One neuron short of a synapse."
>>> > 30. "Some drink from the fountain of
>>> > knowledge; he only gargled."
>>> > 31. "Takes him 2 hours to watch 60-minutes."
>>> > 32. "The wheel is turning, but the hams ter is
>>> > dead."