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[ 10 posts ] |
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shibby
[n00b] Member
Joined: Wed Jan 25, 2006 12:00 am Posts: 1197 Location: Howell, Michigan
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 a couple jokes
THE PENIS WANTS A RAISE!
I, the Penis, hereby requests a raise in salary for the following reasons:
1-------- I do physical labor.
2.------- I work at great depths.
3.------- I plunge head first into everything I do.
4.------- I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
5.--------I work in a damp environment.
6. -------I work in a dark area that has poor ventilation.
7.------- I work in high temperatures.
8. -------My work exposes me to diseases.
Reply: Dear Penis,
After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the management denies your request for the following reasons:
1. You do not work 8 hours straight.
2. You WORK IN SHORT SPURTS AND fall asleep after EACH brief work period.
3. You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
4. You do not stay in your designated area, and are often seen visiting other locations.
5. You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
6. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
7. You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.
8. You will retire LONG before you are 65.
9. You are unable to work double shifts.
10. You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task.
11. And if that were not all, you have constantly been seen entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious looking bags.
Sincerely, The Management
Five reasons not to be a penis
1. You're bald your whole life.
2. You have a hole in your head.
3. Your neighbors are nuts.
4. The guy behind you is an ass hole and...
5. Every time you get excited, you throw up and then faint
_________________HEADSHOT wrote: You would care after your d**k looks like a cheese pizza
<img src="http://i166.photobucket.com/albums/u91/sapikowski/remoteImage.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket">
<img src="http://pid.us.playstation.com/user/sapikowski.jpg" width="235" height="149" border="0">
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| Sun Mar 25, 2007 9:16 pm |
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Skippy
[n00b] Member
Joined: Thu Apr 13, 2006 11:00 pm Posts: 206 Location: CA
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lmao, thats some funny shit
_________________My Movie!
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| Sun Mar 25, 2007 11:07 pm |
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SEIJIsaurusREX
[n00b] Member
Joined: Sun Feb 20, 2005 12:00 am Posts: 457 Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
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roflpwnt so hard
_________________
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| Mon Mar 26, 2007 1:33 am |
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Rosh
[n00b] Member
Joined: Thu Jan 25, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 446 Location: Canto XXXIV of Dante's Inferno
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lawl
_________________ <img src="http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y2/taiwanesebuddy/roflcopter.gif"</a>
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| Mon Mar 26, 2007 2:25 am |
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Spork
Dirty Hippie (nobody likes this guy)
Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2004 11:00 pm Posts: 2198 Location: ATX
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lol that was pretty good.
_________________
Sporks pwn all other utensils.
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| Mon Mar 26, 2007 3:21 am |
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shibby
[n00b] Member
Joined: Wed Jan 25, 2006 12:00 am Posts: 1197 Location: Howell, Michigan
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i thought you guys might like that
_________________HEADSHOT wrote: You would care after your d**k looks like a cheese pizza
<img src="http://i166.photobucket.com/albums/u91/sapikowski/remoteImage.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket">
<img src="http://pid.us.playstation.com/user/sapikowski.jpg" width="235" height="149" border="0">
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| Mon Mar 26, 2007 5:15 am |
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vAntheMaN
[n00b] Member
Joined: Tue May 02, 2006 11:00 pm Posts: 777 Location: MEXICO
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 Re: a couple jokes
shibby wrote: THE PENIS WANTS A RAISE!
1. You're bald your whole life. 2. You have a hole in your head. 3. Your neighbors are nuts. 4. The guy behind you is an ass hole and... 5. Every time you get excited, you throw up and then faint
LOL ITS FREAKINGLY FUNNY
_________________ vAn the MaN

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| Mon Mar 26, 2007 1:58 pm |
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Amish
[n00b] Member
Joined: Thu Feb 22, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 298
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 Re: a couple jokes
shibby wrote: THE PENIS WANTS A RAISE! I, the Penis, hereby requests a raise in salary for the following reasons: 1-------- I do physical labor. 2.------- I work at great depths. 3.------- I plunge head first into everything I do. 4.------- I do not get weekends or public holidays off. 5.--------I work in a damp environment. 6. -------I work in a dark area that has poor ventilation. 7.------- I work in high temperatures. 8. -------My work exposes me to diseases.
should this say 'I do not get off on weekends or public holidays' instead? seems liek it might make more sense.
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| Mon Mar 26, 2007 3:11 pm |
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shibby
[n00b] Member
Joined: Wed Jan 25, 2006 12:00 am Posts: 1197 Location: Howell, Michigan
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i didn't write it that is how i got it in my e-mail
_________________HEADSHOT wrote: You would care after your d**k looks like a cheese pizza
<img src="http://i166.photobucket.com/albums/u91/sapikowski/remoteImage.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket">
<img src="http://pid.us.playstation.com/user/sapikowski.jpg" width="235" height="149" border="0">
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| Mon Mar 26, 2007 8:33 pm |
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Noyps
[n00b] Member
Joined: Wed Jan 03, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 76 Location: illinois
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ROFL!!! Yellow_Flash_Colorz_PDT_04
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| Tue Mar 27, 2007 4:24 pm |
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