Things women should know about men!!!!


1. Men are NOT mind readers.

2. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

3 Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

4. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

5. Crying is blackmail.

6. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

7. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

8. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's
what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

9. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem.
See a doctor.

10. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

11. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
to act like soap opera guys.

12. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

13. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of them
makes you sad or angry, then we meant the other one

14. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

15. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.

16. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

17. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We
have no idea what mauve is.

18. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

19. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle, besides we
know you will bring it up again later.

20. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
you don't want to hear.

21. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is
fine...Really.

22. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
or golf.

23. You have eno! ugh clothes.

24. You have too many shoes.

25. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

26. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can -
to give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can -
to give them a bigger laugh

Haha, some of those were really good.

nice,...wtf is mouve? is it like purple or somn??

Yes, it is.

i had to tell those to my wife some of them are very true

I'm married. lol. this is true, naggers.

my girl laughed her head off at these.....and yes....most are true

I'm making my GF read them right now.

i think # 12 is funny