Welcome to Angry Kitten's Retard Friendly Guide to Joining [n00b]! If by the end of this guide you find that you still are unable to join, don't ask Kitten. He won't care.

Step 1: Go to www.n00bfest.com as shown. Don't ask questions. Just do it. (Protip: you're already there!)

Step 2: Click on the image clearly labelled "Forum".

Step 3: Click on the Register Link. Don't ask, just do.

Step 4: Select the year you were born. If you get this wrong, stop now.

Step 5: Agree to the Terms and Conditions.

Step 6: Fill out the necessary information on the Forum Registration page. Don't forget to input the Captcha image so we know you're not a robot designed to steal our mojo. If you are unable to read the Capcha image, you can buy new eyes on eBay*.

Step 7: Great! Now check your email and click on the activation link.

Step 8: READ THESE THREADS. READ THEM. DO NOT PROCEED UNTIL YOU HAVE READ THEM. DO IT.

Step 9: Fill out a thread with an appropriately formatted application. Click preview and make sure you sound smarter than Terry Schaivo. Click submit.

Congratulations! You just had to refer to a guide to join n00b. You should feel like a retard.