i got laughs

I was giving my nephew a bath the other day when he asked, "Uncle Chow Mein, why is your penis so much different than mine?"

Well nephew, yers isn't hard.






I was walking my nephew into the woods the other day when he said, "Uncle Chow Mein, I'm scared!"

I said, "You think you are scared, I have to walk out of here alone!"






Husband walks into his bedroom with a sheep under his arm while his wife was in bed.

Husband, "See honey, this is the pig I F*CK when you have a headache."

Wife, "You dumbass, that is a sheep not a pig."

Husband, "I wasn't talking to you."

I win.

i heard a similar one .

Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench?
the bench can support a family